Titles and Lies

Timeless seems to have dropped ‘rabbit man’, for which I am incredibly grateful. If nothing else, it denoted my top hat and reminds me of the masked incident which I’d dearly love to leave behind. I leave so many things behind these days I’m constantly surprised no-one follows a trail to find me.

Still, Timeless seems ready to start calling me Homeless Helper (HH, to those whose ‘Syllable Enthusiasm’ levels fluctuate) and I’m wondering if I need to drop “Timeless” in need of something else. More often now, the word ‘Womble’ seems to echo around me, which I wrote off as a TARDIS reminder that I need to visit Wimbledon. Perhaps Timeless has yet even more to him than meets the eye. I’ve started a personal game of guessing who he could ask to write his own biography. My first suggestion was Shakespeare, just to see if I could mess with his head after all the times he’s clouded my own.

But I have one little crumb of comfort whenever I try to ‘solve’ Timeless/Womble. Just as I know next to nothing about his backstory, he knows about the same of mine. The war, the lies, the secrecy, and most importantly, the false title. He accepted Homeless Helper all too easily, but I wonder what happens should the day comes when he asks for my actual name.

Guess I could just lie, we Timelords are notorious for our cover stories. Just look at The Doctor. A man of medicine? Please. I’m two regenerations ahead and he’s killed more life-forms than I can shake a luminous Jetagog-6 stick at. And those things are HUGE.

Anyway, I’ve no desire to delve further into my past, and I think the timeless Womble will be returning from the TARDIS toilets any moment now; provided he doesn’t get lost or distracted on the way back. Like I said, in terms of knowing each other’s histories, he and I are on equal footing. As far as I can work out, it’ll stay that way unless we need it otherwise. Some secrets are revealing, some are interesting, some are vital. And some are dangerous. I think both HH and W have secrets of that latter category.

Time for another adventure, don’t you think?


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